Why do Tortoises Always Head North?

This month we have a few real brain teasers for you. Thanks go to Professor Kimberley for kick-starting those little grey cells with the question ‘Why do tortoises always head North?’ Professor Kimberley writes: ‘The two tortoises we have at Crete Kennels, namely Argo and Jason, always head North when out and about. These two are both one year old - each has its own character, though they both like to be stroked on the head and chin. It's a charmed life for these two. Everything is done in a ‘siga, siga’ (slowly, slowly) Greek way. And they get to sleep all winter! However, they are great explorers and have to be watched carefully when out on a stroll. The local birds of prey hover around looking for dinner: ‘meat in a basket! The tortoises are Spur Thigh Marginated (ie rough shelled), partly due to being reared in captivity on good food. They were bred on Crete - the result of a mating of a 40 year old who finally 'did things' with a 35 year old male (his first time too) - Virgin Sex at that age is rare! The result was a lot of eggs and the subsequent babies - the sexing of which cannot be determined or apparent until they are 5 years old. The Spur Thigh was once indigenous to Crete so foreign (Turkish) tortoises, beware…. Back to my original question. They do seem to head north over any obstacle, does anyone have any idea why? They also have the instinct to stop and do a 'four claw turn', when nearing a precipice or the edge of land or rock. Finally, as they can live to over 100 years old, we oldies at Crete Kennels know that they will far outlive us! - we can just about keep up with their pace as it is!’

Editor’s note: We set the Bugle Boffins on to this. However all they came up with was a journal article from Behavioural Brain Research with the snappy title ‘Lateralized righting behavior in the tortoise (Testudo hermanni)’ by Stancher et al (2006). There were a lot of very long words in the abstract which made our heads hurt, so we went to the pub instead. Sorry!

Is Porridge a Science?

Perhaps not, but it certainly is an art form worth taking seriously. Hats off to Scotland (yet again!) for providing the venue for the World Porridge Making Championships in October. For those of our international readers who may be wondering, ‘porridge’ is a traditional breakfast food made by boiling oatmeal in water, sometimes indistinguishable from wallpaper paste when made badly. The Greek for porridge is το πόριτζ (see, Greek isn’t that difficult, after all - but yes, I was surprised to find it in the dictionary too). ‘Porridge’ is also slang for ‘doing time in prison’. Anyway, back to the contest. This was held in Carrbridge, Strathspey, the grand prize being the Golden Spurtle (no, I am not making this up), which is apparently a type of spatula traditionally used in Scotland to make porridge.

The winner this year was Ian Bishop on his 15th attempt who was delighted to receive his prize from Miss Scotland. So what was the magic formula? Ian Bishop attributed his success to use of local water from a bore hole tapped 100ft down into an underground river. In the traditional section of the contest, entrants could only use water, oats and salt. Entries were given marks on the basis of taste, colour and consistency. According to the report that we read on the BBC website, judges were surprised by the diversity of the various porridges produced. There was a Speciality Porridge contest too, where contestants could choose any ingredients they liked to add to the traditional mix. Recipe for disaster, some might say….The winner of the speciality section was Addy Daggert, a Dutch chef. Addy jazzed up his mix by adding marzipan, home-made ice cream and 18 year old Glenfiddich whisky. One assumes that he also poured a large amount of the whisky into himself before dreaming up this concoction….

When is a Beach not a Beach?

Why, when it’s in Trelawny, Jamaica, of course! Police there are baffled by the disappearance of over 500 truckloads of sand from a planned tourist resort at Coral Spring Beach on the north coast of the island. Developers had to put their plans on hold after discovering that their greatest asset - 400 metres of white sand beach - had somehow vanished in July. Four months on, no arrests have been made, and some people have suggested that there has been a political cover up (but where have they hidden the sand?). And as Mark Shields, Deputy Commissioner of Police explained, tracking down the culprits is going to be a complex task: “You've got the receivers of the stolen sand, or what we believe to be the sand. The trucks themselves, the organisers and, of course, there is some suspicion that some police were in collusion with the movers of the sand”, he said. Forensic tests are currently being carried out on other beaches on the island. Watch this space….

Just a couple of other little gems from the international media: In Japan, police have arrested a bridegroom - to - be after he apparently got cold feet the night before the wedding and set fire to his hotel room (sorry about the pun). In France, a man had to be rescued from a high speed train after his arm got sucked into a toilet. He was trying to retrieve his mobile phone which had fallen into the toilet bowl when the super efficient suction system trapped him. Fire crews took two hours to saw through the pipe work, and he was carried off the train with the toilet still attached to his arm. And finally….it might not surprise you to learn that Elvis heads the list of Top Ten Best Paid Dead People, but it might to learn that Einstein is doing well at number four (Something to do with a Disney toy, apparently).